:: All That You Can't Leave Behind ::

:: Tuesday, February 22, 2005 ::

Matchmaker, Matchmaker, Make Me A Match

I think I've underestimated my powers and should now just use them for evil instead of good. Somehow, I've managed to hook up two people that I already had separate crushes on. How do I do this? I am amazed. Now the gratitude is just flowing my way due to my completely unintentional co-mingling of people.

Fuckity, fuck.

As if it wasn't difficult enough, I've managed to screw myself over twice at the same time.
:: Estoy_Libre 1:00 AM [+] ::
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Why Can't Marcia Cross Be Gay?

I love redheads. Always have, always will. There's something utterly unique and sexy about them. My love affair with those who are fire-inclined started years ago with Shirley Manson of Garbage fame. Ever since I've been hooked, flitting from one ginger-haired beauty to the next. Most recently, Melissa Archer on OLTL. Which brings me to the topic of my entry...

WHY CAN'T MARCIA CROSS BE GAY?

Damn the woman makes my knees go weak!

I was going to wax poetic about this a bit more but think that I'll just leave my impassioned plea as it is... God bless Red!
:: Estoy_Libre 4:52 PM [+] ::
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The One Where I Quit

So yeah... I gave the BC my two weeks notice on Monday. To say it's still surreal is an understatement. Part of me still can't believe I actually did it, that there is no turning back. When I leave on the 12th I will turn in my lab coats, my key fob, my time card, ect. Never again will I express a platelet or freeze a unit of blood. No more granulocytes or cryoprecipitate. Nothing.

If it makes any sense my job felt like an emotionally abusive relationship. It's amazing what you will put up with for the supposed "security" it brings. To say my self-esteem about my job performance is somewhere in the dirt is an understatement. Even when you know you've done your best somehow the doubt creeps in or it's shoved in your face by others who are all too willing to point out your mistakes.

Everything came to a head last Thursday when my manager called me into her office right after I arrived to work. She sat me down and gave me this "Written Counseling Report" that was full of either lies or things that were blown so out of proportion that it was laughable. I was told that if the behavior continued I would be terminated.

So... Exactly how do I stop doing something I wasn't even doing in the first place?

She was taking all this BS as gospel from my shift supervisor, who makes no attempt to hide her dis-affection for gay people. No matter how "nice" she is to my face, she's probably one of the most two-faced people I've ever encountered in my life. Never have I met someone so hell-bent on making others miserable or unhappy. If it was her intention to get me fired or for me to quit then I guess she got what she wanted. I know from personal experience how difficult it is without the help of one more person so my absence is more than enough revenge.

Still... How can someone do that to another? How wretched must your life be to thrive on the misfortune of others, especially when it was your own actions that put it motion? The epitome of schadenfreude.

There is a positive side however.

On Feb. 26th I'll be flying down to Florida to spend five days in Key West! Fuck yeah!

I'll stick my toes in the sand and recuperate in a timely manner. Catch a few rays and moped around the island while checkin' out the ladies... Yum. There's a bunch of stuff I need to do before then but I'll have two weeks to take care of all of it.

As excited as I am about it, I'm apprehensive about money. I'm trying super hard to focus on the fun part but knowing that I just quit my job is making me as well as my bills a bit twitchy. Everything happens for a reason though and I'm guessing I'll pull through somehow.
:: Estoy_Libre 1:39 AM [+] ::
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